Poking Holes - Healing from CPTSD

Oct 8, 2015Poking Holes1 Commentcptsd, Narcissistic Abusedaughters of narcissistic mothers, denial, depression, golden child, grief, grieving, hoarder, narcissistic moms, postpartum depression, scape goat

I’m so lost and confused. I keep going back and forth between believing that my mom and golden child sister are narcissists, and maybe I’m just being too sensitive, or I’m acting like a spoiled baby. I’m used to being the one to apologize to make things better between mom and I after a disagreement. […]

Narcissism: No contact and the Narcissistic Grandmother

Oct 4, 2015Poking Holescptsd, daughters of narcissistic mothers, No Contactdaughters, family birthdays, narcissistic grandmother, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, no contact

I’m not sure what to do. It is one of my children’s birthday today, and I thought my narcissist mother and narcissist golden child sister would be leaving town this morning. My mother texted my husband yesterday and asked if our child could go over to her house for lunch today. He didn’t mention it […]

Narcissism: I'm the Lost Child of my family

Sep 19, 2015Poking Holescptsd, The Lost Childdaughter of narcissistic mother, daughters of narcissistic mothers, dysfunctional family, golden child, lost child, scapegoat

I think I was wrong about being a former golden child. I don’t think I ever was. I was/am the lost child. I was/am shy and introverted. I worshiped my narcissistic mother and narcissistic golden child sister so they would love me. When I began to speak up and call them on their bullshit, they […]

Narcissism: No Contact

Sep 17, 2015Poking Holescptsd, No Contactdaughters of narcissistic mothers, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, no contact

I tried to go no contact with my narc mom and narc golden child sister. I thought it would be good for me to stay away for a while. Then, I decided I’m too sentimental to do that to my family. Maybe I’m wrong about them. I love them so much and the 3 of […]

Narcissism: I think my so called step mother in law is a narc too!!

Aug 12, 2015Poking Holescptsd, Narcissistic Personality Disordernpd, ptsd, self centered

I just spent a couple of days with my father in law and his girlfriend of a few years, along with my husband and our young son. She manipulated and controlled everything. I feel emotionally drained and beaten down. It was such a horrible time. I ended up with a migraine the first night after […]

Narcissism: Does my fat protect me?

Jul 21, 2015Poking Holescptsd, daughters of narcissistic mothersbinge eating, binging, body image, body shaming, childhood trauma, daughter of a narc mom, dieting, excess weight, fat, metaphysics, my fat protects me, narcissistic grandmother, narcissistic mom, obesity, overweight, sabotage, self protection

I want to talk a bit about body image issues. As far back as I can remember, my narcissistic mom (NM) has been on one diet or another. My Golden Child Sister (GCS) has been watching what she eats since she was 10, if not younger. All 5 of us girls have issues with our […]

Narcissism: You've come to realize a harsh reality…

Jul 19, 2015Poking Holescptsddaughter of a narc mom, daughter of narcissistic mother, daughters of narcissistic mothers, narcissistic mother, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, narcmom

Narcissism: Afraid and Confused

Jul 19, 2015Poking Holescptsdchildhool trauma, daughter of a narc mom, daughter of narcissistic mother, daughters of narcissistic mothers, depression, donm, golden child, narcissistic mother, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, narcmom, npd, self discovery

I’m feeling confused. I feel this way when I try to sink back into the ignorance I’ve lived my life in before the discovery. The discovery that I am the daughter of a narcissistic mother. It’s a pretty big thing to wrap your head around. I’m afraid sometimes to continue because I’m afraid of what […]

Healing from CPTSD

Support & Resources for CPTSD Recovery

Author: Poking Holes

Why Is No Contact So Difficult?