My psychiatrist phoned me on Friday late in the day wanting an in person appointment on the following Monday. We have only had phone appointments, which quite frankly I wish they would keep for us cptsd warriors who don’t feel safe yet. Who’s with me on this?? We should always have the option.

Not only do I not feel safe, but I think it goes a bit deeper with me.
I think I may have figured out why I still hide my identity. Not just because I don’t feel safe due to having cptsd, but because of things my narcissistic mother would constantly say about mental illness. How she would use it to keep us in line. How she made it seem like anybody with mental health issues was crazy and should be locked up. How she called us crazy and told us we should be locked up. How she called our scapegoat sister crazy and how she treated her. This runs deep.

She called me crazy. She made it seem like it was the worst thing in the world. That’s how she kept me quiet. The irony.

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